The Past

After 6 years then i finally know why he treat me like that...

Yesterday conference call with my bro's friends finally made me knew the truth about things that happened 6 years ago...
Jason Ng told me something that my godbrother did last time and they kept it as secret for along time.
After 6 years, just i really knew what had happened...
I totally heart broken last time...

What really happened is that he bought a rose on Valentine's Day but he never gave me the rose...
He kept it until now and I just knew it...OMG
He told me yesterday that it is still in a book
You know why he never gave me the rose???
Because his elder brother bought a rose and a present for me on Valentine's Day...and he decided not to give it to me...
I guess he wanted to give a chance to his brother to tackle me, but didn't he understand that I love him not his brother... I told you before...
By that time, you remember you told me that you love Yun Chee
DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT???
YOU CAN'T FORCE A PERSON TO LOVE SOMEBODY THAT YOU DON'T LIKE RIGHT???
It's a stupid decision that you decided to ignore me in the first way... you treat me like I'm transparent....!!!!!
I don't know what I did wrong but you should had told me earlier...
That is the reason why I hate you so much until now...

But, I really appreciate your time that you teach me Chemistry and Addmaths as I missed the classes due to my attendance in Wilderness Camp in Pulau Langkawi for five days...
By the time I came back, I became so so quiet and I only talk when I'm at home...
That's quite a drastic change on me...
Maybe I'm tired that I need to study for the topics that I missed during the camp...
Thanks for your sweet time with me, I'll remember always...

I do remember to when you said you wanna score goal for me when I go to watch your soccer tournament...
Yea, you did that...
And I still remember that Jason was gossiping about me and you, saying that you score the goal just to show me that you are good...
And deep inside I knew that you are, and I'm proud of it...
But my mum was there and well others said the goal is for my mum.... hahahaha...
Well, I don't mind... I just happy that you tried your very best...

Yet, until now I still remember the accident that happen to you...
It really made me sad and I am so depressed...
That is why I took care of you...
So, your wounds will heal faster...
Well, I care for you so much...
The moments I saw your face after the accident, I couldn't said anything...
I guess you haven't had enough sleep at all as you need to help your mum to sell newspaper...early in the morning at 4am and ride your motorcycle back to your home...
And I guess you don't have enough sleep at all...

The eyes that I look into last time still in my sight and I still and yet can't forget it... It's hard for me to forget you...
You're the first person that I love so much but I knew we couldn't be together the moment my mum took you as her godson...
I am happy too as you became my godbrother, my mum love you so much...
And I couldn't do anything about it...
I kept my feeling as I'm happy to see you...
And I'm happy to have you as my brother too...
That's all that I could ask for...

But why did you change totally after you knowing that your brother wanted to tackle me...???
Why did you do that???
Did you know that you tear my heart into pieces?

But the moment that you choose to be together with Shueu Hwa, I finally realise that you totally changed...
The person that I knew last time totally changed into another person that I barely know...
Beat by beat, I tried to erase you from my memory...
Done a lot of things...
One of that is being a playgirl...
Playing with guys heart...
Changing from one after another...
And also drinking...
Just to forget about you...

I'm happy for Shueu Hwa, as she's my best friend together with Hui Ling...I didn't said anything about you...
I only told them that I can't forget a person...and they assume it was Sky He, as he was my boyfriend before this when I was in early Secondary 5...
That guy is a playboy too...I wouldn't have not forgotten about him... But I didn't said anything... I just keep silence

That is the time when I become quite a clubber, going out late at night, and I'm sure my parents are not happy with it...
Nobody knows it until now when I'm opened to tell it out in my blog...
I kept it secret for a long-long time...

I can't help that I avoiding you, hating you and not wanting to talk to you... but I guess that you wouldn't know about it...
It seems like you're a very playboy right now...
Keep changing your girlfriend...

I'm quite sad with what you had done last time towards my best friend, Shueu Hwa as you had broken her heart, leaving her alone and break up with her in harsh way that she nearly commit suicide just because of you...
Why did you do that???
How many girls that you had made their life being so miserable...???
When would you stop doing that???
Tell me.....
Women are not a play toy for you...
Treat them right...

I hope you'll change...